Angelfire Series, Book 4: Only the Lonely by Karen Wiesner

Chapter 1

Too tired? When is my boyfriend ever too tired to see me? We've been apart for longer than four months. An endless amount of time with hardly any phone calls! And now Robert is finally here and suddenly he's too tired to be with me? Unacceptable!

Diane Hoffman started after her boss of ten plus years and her boyfriend almost as long as that. They both worked for Global Pharmaceuticals. Robert Drake was a "pharma sales rep"--a pharmaceutical sales representative who sold company products all around the region he was responsible for. His job involved a tremendous amount of travel. In an average year, he returned to the home office in New York City maybe three or four times. He traveled so much, he didn't have a true home. He lived in various hotels. His job involved giving elaborate presentations that sold their products. He checked in by phone and email more frequently, of course, but even that couldn't be personal enough for Diane.

Right out of college, she'd joined the company as the administrative assistant for District 2 sales reps. It was exactly the position she'd imagined for herself in college, and she loved her job. But even she had to admit that, since becoming involved with Robert, she'd been thinking about a lot of things she'd promised herself she wouldn't even consider until she was thirty years old--long enough to enjoy her career satisfactorily. Thirty was the age she'd deemed crucial to start having a family before it was too late. Unfortunately, being in love made her want to be married and raising lots of babies. She'd turned thirty-one recently, and her dreams seemed to have come and gone in the ten years she'd been working for and loving her boss.

Wanting more from the relationship certainly qualified as the hardest part about being in love so deeply. Robert traveled so much, his argument against getting married had unfortunately made perfect sense to her this past decade. Having her happily-ever-after put on hold if they were married and he couldn't be around much to be a husband to her and a father to their children would be infinitely harder than what they had been doing together. But I've been waiting in anguish to be with the love of my life. Hasn't he missed me as much? Or is he being playful? He wants me to follow him to our usual hotel in town so he can surprise me?

After very little consideration, Diane decided that had to be why he'd returned after four endless months and immediately left her again. Usually, they enjoyed at least a day and night together before he had another presentation scheduled and had to fly or drive out again.

Grabbing her purse, figuring she was leaving only a few minutes early, she rushed out of the building in time to see Robert getting into his red Lincoln Town Car with the custom license plate that said Drake 8. Surprisingly, a cab pulled up almost as soon as she made it to the sidewalk. She hopped in. "Follow that red Town Car please," she said, feeling slightly giddy. In seconds, she was questioning her decision, but ultimately she always came back to the same conclusion: Even if Robert was as exhausted as he'd claimed, he'd be thrilled to see her once she arrived in their hotel room.

The bottomless gap of time since they'd last seen each other had been so hard on her. She'd fallen into her usual funk whenever her sweetheart had to leave town again. This time, he'd been gone longer, checked in less frequently even at the company, and she always gained weight when she was depressed.

She looked down at her ultra-feminine, pale pink business suit. No denying it felt much tighter than usual. Would Robert notice how many pounds she'd packed on? Why do my mom and sister always have to send me so much fudge? I can't resist it. I gravitate to the freezer constantly, sometimes without even thinking. Because it's pre-cut into such small squares, I always eat more than I should. And I've gone through a truckload in Robert's extended absence.

Diane sighed, feeling ten times larger than she had a moment ago. She reached into her purse to get out her compact mirror. As she checked her hair and makeup, she wondered if her face looked fatter than usual. She made her hand into a shelf and put it under her chin. This is bad. What have I done to myself? Enough binge-eating! But maybe if Robert's here, I'll be able to control myself...at least until he has to leave again. Ugh!

Permanently dissatisfied with what she was seeing in the small mirror, she touched up her lip gloss and combed back her long, wavy mahogany hair, anticipating her arrival at their hotel in a few minutes. But when she looked up, she saw the cab was heading away from Manhattan. Up ahead was the bright red Town Car. Robert said he was so tired. What's he doing? If he's as exhausted as he claimed, wouldn't he be going to the hotel to get some sleep?

Long minutes passed and she saw the Town Car signaling toward the off-ramp--toward New Rochelle! Diane frowned, totally confused. Were they following the wrong car? No, that was Robert's license plate. Did he have a meeting? He hadn't mentioned it and, as his assistant, she usually scheduled any appointment he needed, including those for dentist and doctor.

More time passed, and they were definitely heading out of the city. Diane wrestled with whether or not to continue with this spontaneous little surprise. She'd rushed out spur-of-the-moment, planning to follow him to their hotel. Robert clearly wasn't going anywhere of the sort. So shouldn't she call this off?

Though her heart fought her head, she couldn't deny the vague sense of disquiet in her chest. She couldn't define what she was feeling. Nevertheless, dread filled her until she couldn't have spoken to say "Turn around" to the cab driver even though she desperately wanted to.

More than a half hour passed, and they were nearing New Rochelle. The cab driver periodically asked if he should continue following. She only nodded, experiencing a burning sensation in her heart. The Town Car entered a city Diane couldn't remember ever being in before. She knew a lot of New Yorker's moved here because it was an ideal place to raise a family.

What was Robert doing here though? Did he have family in New Rochelle? He almost never spoke of relatives. She'd gotten a strong impression the few times they spoke of family that something had happened--some kind of horrific rift--that brought him pain. And so he, and she, avoided the subject altogether. Or is that what I wanted to believe because the alternative was that he was hedging?

What am I thinking? This is Robert. My love. He's a good man. I know him...

Her thoughts shut off as they entered a residential area with elegant, stately older homes. The landscaping was almost too perfect. Diane's throat closed as an alarm wailed in her head. The Town Car drove into the attached two-car garage that opened just as he pulled up to the old-fashioned house. He has a garage-door opener for this home. Why? Why is he here? Who lives here? The red car parked inside the far right slot and, a moment later, the garage door started to come down.

The cab slowed, then stopped, and Diane felt the driver looking at her expectantly in the rearview mirror. Her gaze barely strayed from the house out the passenger window. The mailbox they were parked almost right next to said "Drake" with the address. That address burned into her brain even as she thought there could be only two explanations for why Robert's name was on the mailbox: 1) He had family, a sibling or parents, that lived here and he was visiting them...and they allowed him to use their garage while he was here--though they were presumably estranged. Right. That sounds about as logical as a convertible on a rainy day. 2) He had family that lived here. His family. A wife...

Diane found herself rolling down the window of the cab, and immediately she heard the squeal of young children nearby. A young boy and girl appeared around the side of the house the cab was closest to, but then a female voice called for them to return to the backyard. A baseball-size lump filled her throat. Robert's children. Robert's wife...

"Lady, what do you wanna do?" the cab driver demanded impatiently, making her realize he must have spoken this same sentence more than once in an attempt to get her attention.

"Go back," she whispered painfully. "Back to New York City." Her lips wooden, she gave her address in the city.

The driver muttered dismissively, "It's your dime, lady" and made a fluid U-turn.

Ten years. Ten years and nothing but lies. All of it lies. Robert Drake, the love of my life, the man of my dreams, is married with kids. He used me. I'm a...God please no!...a mistress.

Her mind was scrambling and she knew if she didn't talk to someone right this minute, she'd burst into tears or unending screams. What would the car driver think of his passenger wailing all the way back to the city?

It's my dime.

Diane got out her cell phone and called her best friend and roommate, Roxanne Hart. At the moment, she didn't care what the driver heard over the rap music playing on the radio. She knew Rox was supposed to be packing for her trip to the Christian Dior Haute Couture show in Paris, where she would be modeling, but her friend sounded half-awake when she picked up. Diane and Roxanne had met at Columbia University in New York, as roommates then, too, and they'd been fast friends ever since. With her long white-blond hair, golden skin and killer body, Rox had been discovered as a model before she'd gotten a Bachelor of Arts degree majoring in music. After securing her degree, she took up modeling full-time and her career took off.

"Roxanne...it's over," Diane said quietly, not looking at the cabbie.

Strangely, that was all she needed to say. "With Robert? Mr. No-Show?" her friend guessed immediately. "Where are you?"

"In a cab. Coming back to the city."

"Hmm. How long until you're home?"

"Forty-five minutes or so."

"Okay. I'll call Darlene and Cherish. We'll be here when you get home."

Darlene Radcliffe was Diane's other best friend. Cherish had become part of their circle in the last couple years, though Diane didn't know her that well. She owned the flower shop Darlene worked. "Why?" Diane asked nervously.

"Look, you know I'm leaving for the Paris show soon. You're gonna need someone who knows what's going on so you're not alone through this."

Diane couldn't argue. She'd never felt more alone in her life and she wanted to be surrounded with the people who cared about her now.

The rest of the cab ride was surreal and she barely had enough ready cash to pay the fare, making the cab driver even more impatient and rude with her considering how low his tip was. She stumbled inside the security building and into the elevator.

Oh, Robert. Not my Robert. He's the perfect man. I fell in love with him within days of coming to work for him and the other District 2 sales reps at Global. He was so charming and mature. I'd never met a man like him, especially not in the small farm town I grew up in rural Wisconsin or in college where all the guys I dated were so childish and stupid. Robert always knew exactly what to say and do to make me agree to anything he suggested. He said he never intended to fall in love with me either, but we spent so much time together outside work that first year. The company frowns on inter-office romances. But his attraction to me was too strong to deny. Still, he said we had to be careful not to let anyone at work know about our personal relationship. He's been unyieldingly stringent about that, even when several of our co-workers openly paired off.

Both Darlene and Rox came to meet her at the door, Darlene saying that Cherish was sorry not to be present, too, but there'd been an emergency at work. Roxanne's face looked lined on one side, as if she'd been sleeping away the day instead of packing. Even her gorgeous eyes had dark circles under them.

"Where are Jace and the kids?" Diane asked, glancing Darlene's way and feeling guilty for dragging her friend away from her young family over something so embarrassing. Over what? My life being finished? And now it's to be public humiliation for my decade of blind stupidity.

Darlene waved her hand. "Jace is watching them."

Her two friends led her to the sofa in the luxurious living room of the high rise apartment Roxanne's salary as a supermodel easily afforded. Rox wouldn't hear of Diane paying more than a third of the rent, since she'd been the one to insist she didn't want to live alone here.

"Tell us everything," Rox demanded without preface as they sat down, bracketing her.

Darlene spilled her guts to her friends, somehow managing to do so without sobbing her heart out. Some part of her felt numb with shock. This couldn't be happening. She must have misunderstood somehow. I've been eating so much fudge in my misery. Maybe he noticed how fat I've gotten and he didn't want anything to do with me.

Diane groaned at her own ridiculous thoughts. That's insane. What an idiot I am. This isn't about me. This is about ten years of deception! Ten years of being in the dark. Ten years of being someone's fool.

Diane didn't know her own mind. She wanted an explanation for what she'd seen, something simple--something she could fix herself, like going on a much-needed diet. How, without an ounce of discipline? I've never had any. Especially where Robert Drake is concerned.

"I gave him ten years of my life. He was so good to me. I love him so much. He's so sophisticated and handsome. You should see him in his expensive suits..." She shook her head, her mind scattered and jumbled with too much at once.

"See him? We've never even met him!" Darlene hooted in disbelief, glancing at Rox. "Well, you did that once when you showed up at the restaurant he was trying to hide her in the back corner of." Roxanne had said she'd wanted to see this reputed "prince" for herself.

"I knew something was wrong. All these months. He barely called this time. Checked in at the office with emails instead of calls. We haven't seen each other since March! Or was it late February? And look at me. I'm so fat I barely fit in my clothes anymore!"